Saturday, 18 January 2014

How to use your human - A Cat’s Instruction Manual

Are you a cat who has recently adopted a human? Watch out! Humans are bizzarecreatures who love their daily routine. They have cereals and coffee for breakfast. Boring. They sleep at night and never dream of catching a mouse. Boring. They can watch TV hours on end. Double boring! I wonder why they are called “coach potato”. You can play with a potato, while humans can sit still and watch other people play a sport.God of cats! Humans are boring!

If they don’t have a child of their own, they’ll get on your nerves buying you funny clothes that make you look stupid or toys you don’t want to play with. They hold you in their arms when you’d rather climb a tree and give a bath in their tub. Be careful when you enter a room accompanied by your human. They are so clumsy and can shut the door on your tail. Fight hard when they try to give a bath, unless you know how to swim.

 Beware of humans! They call themselves owners. Let them think they are, but follow the instructions to live a cat’s life in dignity.

I have downloaded Simon’ videos to illustrate thirty-four days in the life a VIP cat. About half a billion viewers have learned my tricks and are using them successfully at home. I hope you’ll fall in love with my personality, creativity and perseverance.

Who can use this post?
• People who need an adorable, cute companion (that's me!) and haven’t made up their mind whether they want a cat or a dog.
English teachers who want to teach their young and adult learners in a fun way. (Tip: Divide the class into pairs, one group facing the screen, the other one with their back to it. While the video is playing, the student watching it tells his/ her partner what is happening. As the videos are very short, the teacher can play it to the end. The pairs write sentences about what happened in chronological order and share with another group or discuss as a class. 
 • Don’t forget to give full instructions before the activity starts. 

According to the level of the group, the teacher can suggest the students what to pay attention to. 
e.g. Describe what you see: Who is doing what? What do they look like? What objects do you see in the video? Summarize what they are saying.( Elementary level)
Have you, your family, or friends ever experienced the problem? Describe what happened. Summarize what they are saying. (Intermediate +)

Activity adapted from Zero Prep: Ready-to-Go Activities for the Language Classroom by Laurel Pollard, Natalie Hess, and Jan Herron.
 Co-authors:
Miss Marie                                                and                            Miss Sara


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